December 30, 2020
Your body is so much more than someone else’s opinion on it
We’ve all experienced it. Whether you’re a size 0 or you shop in the plus size section – or you’re somewhere in between – we’ve all experienced someone telling us our body isn’t good enough. We’ve all been told we’re too fat, too skinny, our tummies are too big, our cellulite is ugly, we need to eat more, we need to eat less, the list goes on and on of ways that our bodies have been insulted. It’s happened for generations. Even though the societal norms for what is “sexy” have changed, one thing has not – our bodies are criticized to no end.
Why? Why is it that we are conditioned to think that the very thing keeping us alive isn’t good enough unless it looks a very specific way? Our bodies do so much for us yet we treat them like we hate them. I’ve gone on a journey this year to change that about myself and here is what I’ve learned:
Our bodies are incredible in everything they do. Think about it, there are millions of tiny moving parts that were all perfectly designed to make you, well, YOU. Somehow all of these small individual parts come together to keep you alive. That’s pretty cool stuff.
Size does not equal health. It’s important to love and take care of our bodies – but we must remember that someone’s pants size or a number on a scale does not equal overall health. I’m a relatively healthy individual overall – and I’m still a plus size woman. I have friends who eat like nobody’s business and they’re still thin. And that is OKAY.
Tummies specifically are wonderful. They help us eat the delicious food we love, some are able to hold whole human beings, they’re soft, they’re cute, and we need them to live. Mine might be bigger than yours. Mine has stretch marks and it jiggles when I run. Yours might be toned and smooth. Either way, our tummies all serve the same purpose which is to keep us alive and nourished.
You can still be confident and have bad days. Too often we get into this mindset that when trying to change our habits, it’s “all or nothing.” In the very wise words of my therapist (because I go to therapy and that’s OKAY!), we should shoot to practice our good habits most of the time. If we fail sometimes, that’s okay. What matters is that we’re trying. The same goes for building up your confidence – it’s okay if you feel like the hot b-word you are one day and if the next day you’re not feeling it. What matters is that you’re actively trying to love your body more and more as time goes on.
Anyone can do boudoir – yes, even you. I thought for the longest time that I would hate any sexy photos I had taken of myself because of my size. Then I shot with Amy for the first time and I felt a whole new level of confidence that I haven’t seen in myself before. For the first time, I saw myself as a truly attractive and sexy person. I was a plus-size girl getting pictures taken in her underwear and I was KILLING IT. Everyone deserves that feeling.
This year has been about a lot of personal growth and self-love for me, even with the pandemic going on. I have learned to be kind to my body because she is carrying me through so many hardships. Our bodies deserve to be fueled, loved, cherished, and accepted exactly as they are. Even with stretch marks, cellulite, dimples, freckles, moles, discoloration, bumps, lumps, and everything else that comes with being a human being in a human body.
So I challenge you to try what I did this year. Try being kinder to yourself throughout 2021. Even if you have days where you’re feeling down, you’ll notice that before long it gets easier and easier to look in the mirror and say
Because you are, and you deserve to think that way about yourself.
Shooting with Amy helped me incredibly, and I’m so excited to watch other women feel as confident as I did when I did my first shoot. The shoot is just the first step – we have to learn to think we’re as hot as we are in those photos at all times.
I hope you have the best, brightest, most filled with self-love 2021 EVER.